It is important for all to learn how to control one’s anger as it
has long lasting consequences at emotional, physical and mental
level.Anger is reaction to something. Learn how to respond rather than
react when angry and you will learn how to control anger easily.
If your anger persists for recurring times, determine what is making
you angry. For particular situation, It may be way of talking of
person, his attitude, your inability to express, past experiences,
expectations, bad relationship and many others.
If you become angry at small instances work with reason behind same.
Once you know reason, you and try to eradicate emotions behind that
reason and control your anger next time.
Parent, Adult and Child:
In psychological terms, there are always 3 aspects stored at mental level which are Parent, Adult and child modes. Amongst 3 modes, person has to be in Adult mode for facing any situation in life.
Child mode It is way
small child behaves for certain situation. It throws tantrums and
behaves the way it likes. Every person stores emotions and experiences
of when he was child in this mode throughout the life. If child has
gone through traumatic childhood, it is possible that his child mode is
always on.
Parent modeOur
parents have behaved with us in a particular way when we were children.
When we face some situations in life, we tend to react to it way our
parents must have reacted to it. Ones those who got angry parents, will naturally be inclined to be
angry at short intervals even without them noticing it. This is their
parent mode.
Adult mode Person
who has learnt to control anger is one who is in his Adult mode. Adult
mode is perceptions, experiences which person has built throughout his
life. Adult mode is able to judge what is good/bad for him and he can
react in positive way.
If you meet calm and sensible person who never gets angry even
though he has traumatic childhood and divorced parents are ones who are
in their Adult mode.
When person is in Adult mode he never becomes angry as he learns to
empathize with other person is able to control his feelings though
there are bad parents and child mode in him. He is one who has taken
control over his emotions and he has learnt to respond rather than
react.
When you are angry body reacts with generating hormones that are not
good for your health. This increases stress levels in body. This in
turn gives rise to various diseases like heart, diabetes, kidney
problems etc and in worst cases cancer.
Tips for controlling the Anger:
1) Learn to be in adult mode and analyse your parents and child
modes to do this. Determine what is good for you and your health and
for being healthy
2) Try meditation techniques like Reiki, Yoga to calm your mind of daily tensions and hence control anger.
3) If particular person/situation increases your anger, learn to
either face them or avoid them totally. If you know you are going to
become angry on particular occasion, you will be to control it more.
4) Worry can be sometimes be the cause of Keep attitude of gratitude
in life and thank God/Supreme for bestowing you immense happiness in
life. This will automatically calm your mind and you will learn on how
to control anger.
5) For extreme cases, visit psychiatrist or reiki practitioner who
will heal anger at emotional, physical and psychological level.
